lustful love

Their lips mated with each other, every breath they took would grind and moan with longing. He ran his fingers through her long black locks twisting it around his fist and pulling, so her neck would be exposed. “Kiss me, kiss me there” a kiss so forbidden that when his lips touched her pulse, her knees gave way. He gripped her body and pressed it tightly against his, he felt every inch of her and his breath became ragged. “I cannot do without this, without touching you, wanting you, being inside of you. A mere second is too much without holding you. A ghra let me love you”. She stepped out of his arms and removed her clothing standing before him naked and wanting. Her hands moved down her body as she enticed him, rounding her breasts and pinching her nipples a pained moan escaped from her parted lips. As he watched her his hands clenched at his side restraining himself from touching her, moving to her so he could take what she so willingly wanted to give. She panted as her fingers drew near to her sex twisting and untwisting her thighs for she knew that he would be inside of her moving wetly inch by inch. “No more, no more of this torture.” He said he laid her softly onto the bed and pushed apart her legs kissing her slowly he pressed his hands on her thighs showing some of the violent need he felt. He growled as he reached her cunt and found it swollen and wet. Savagely he kissed her wetness and felt her quiver. Moaning she gripped his head between her legs and arched into him moving her hips restlessly. He sucked at her clitoris then moved lower and pierced her opening with his tongue in, out, in and out “yes. . . yes oh you make me so wild for you.” Thrashing on the bed her head turning from side to side she gave herself over to the feelings he evoked. Unashamed she arched into his hungry tongue and climaxed. “Enough!” she exclaimed moving upward he lay between her legs and ground against her sensitive sex. “Please . . . please I need to feel you.” She ripped his draw strings apart and shoved his pants down. His cock landed heavily in her hand gently she directed it to her entrance and gasped as his tip jutted inside of her. He tore her hand away and drove into her fast and hard. A scream so filled with passion tore from her lips and her body submitted. He cupped her buttocks and withdrew to the hilt then pounded swiftly once, twice. He crammed her full swiveling his hips he massaged her with the tip of his cock again he entered her ramming into her as she screamed and moaned his name. “I can feel you are close, touch me.” She gripped his hips and her nails dug into his flesh bowing up she put her legs tightly around him. His head tilted back as her nails scratched down his back scorching his skin with flames. Her toes curled as the orgasm rocketed through her body she gushed wetly as he thrusted manically finding his release as well.

My Worth

When your heart is tired and your faith numb.
When worlds collide and paths never cross
who can you turn to, to lead the way?
Who will pick you up when your bones are scattered across the floor?
My life has gone from sour to bitter
And I feel lost and betrayed.
So lost in my despair and despondency that the darkness
enveloping me feels like hope.
I cry and cry then gouge my eyes from its sockets.
When will it end?
When will it be done stripping me and breaking me to nothingness?
I feel weightless in this sea of loathing
and wish I could just disperse.
What will I become? How will I survive?
When all I have are brokenness and lies.

I cherish lose moments when the sun shone on my face.
When I had the comfort of knowing my fate.
I twist and turn in this restless abyss
that confines me to its walls.
I cannot escape
yet,
do I really want to?

If I cannot fix what is broken then all hope is lost.
What am I supposed to do? How am I to stay strong?
When every avenue I take rejects who I am.
It hurts so much and changed my attitude towards the world.
I know that in this world of war I will not last forever am I the sacrificial lamb?
Everyone’s welcome mat?

Help me, help me understand why I’ve been chosen
to be the fool for those who need an example!

I will fester and rot away
Never knowing the true meaning of my worth.

conflicting feelings

Conflicting feelings, feelings I have no right feeling.
You know I’m starting to think that I really have some kind of feelings for this guy
but, I’m also getting this off vibe from him.
That “You’re too clingy” vibe.
I’m not the clingy type yet, I find myself wondering
Where is he? Who is he with?
It’s so darn irritating and I’m so scared that I’ll lose him.
Do you see what I mean? CLINGY!!
So should I just avoid him until he forgets I’ve ever existed?
Come up with an argument maybe?
Problem is I need him, I’ve never needed anyone this much before
Well besides my mom.
Now I need him and it pisses me off, it hurts me.
I’m so afraid that he’s taking me for a fool.
That he has this whole other life when his not with me.
I mean “happiest when I receive a package” OUCH!
DON”T I MAKE YOU HAPPY?
It stung me to the bone when he said that.
Maybe I shouldn’t feel this way you know, maybe I’m not entitled to it.
I feel stripped bare this way.
Do I want to feel like this?
Is it worth feeling like I’m not wanted or needed or even loved! As a matter of fact.
But I love him, the Asshole.
Maybe I should forget about him and move on it would be better right?

So many questions and maybes and not enough answers.

__NIM CASTLE

A Cursed Future

How is it I can suffer for pain I have not yet felt?
To cringe and cry and whither for someone I won’t remember to forget.
I stare at the blue seamless sky.
and I darken from despair.
I sit in this tower behind lock and key
Above and beyond all, yet still I wish to be free.
Visions I see of futures past while my eyes slowly glaze over.
Moaning and huffing I search for your face.
In this crowded and endless dream.

I hurt when I see you lay with another and move beneath the sheets.
I see how virile and passionate you are.
As you groan and scream with pleasure.
I see him stiffen and raise his head as if he senses my presence.
Yet, he cannot know me cannot see my saddened eyes
for I am in the past and with struggle I quiet my cries.
With hatred I watch him kiss his woman and satisfies her needs.
I scream and rage inside myself and send up heartfelt pleas.

How can my spirit be bound to his if we are millions of years apart!
In my tower I welcome darkness as I banish him from my sight.
My soul roams the lonely seas
that crash and drown those who are lost.
I sit alone
on the cold winter stone.
Wishing he were here
to comfort and tease.
“I know who you are A ghra” says a voice so soft
and my lashes begin to flutter.
With hope in my heart I twist around and see him staring at me.

He reaches out to take my hand
and before I can comply,
another takes my place in his
and I sit there in denial.
He breaks me so and rips me slowly
without him even knowing.

This curse I endure
Is hatred so pure
that hardens my soul of souls.

Alone in my tower
I strengthen my power
Waiting for millennia to pass

love is the endless game we play. we hurt each other only to kiss and make up we argue for days on end stay mad for months only to give in for something that was stupid to fight over in the first place. why do we do this? this chase around the bushes. is no one straight forward anymore? is there no loyalty no trust between lovers? are we worthy of love? do we deserve it? we masquerade around stomping on the heads of those who are lonely and live in the darkness. love is such a pure emotion but we darken it, tarnish its luster. shame on those who find pleasure in betrayal, unfaithfulness and pain. where are your morals? it angers me to see those who think love is an easy pick up card and easy “jump into my pants” ticket to my bed.

love should be locked away until a generation comes that can fully appreciate it for the beautiful treasure and magic it is. to fall in love lost in love and to cherish it.

no man can live without it.

Goddess Of The Night

Darkness twirls and mists around me
and I shiver with cold and fright.
As I step into the ground beneath me
I cringe with fear and spite
Afraid I am of the queen I seek
The mighty one who is all
I glance at the moon and call upon her
Who is said to own the night
Goddess of darkness surround me with your power and bring forth my light.
As I stand alone in the woods I feel my spirit take flight.
Entranced I am with your graceful power your vengeance and motherly care.

I call upon you this hour oh beautiful Hecate.
Sustain my hunger for your praise
I acquire your helpful ways
To save me from this danger.
Please mighty Hecate grace me with your presence
And remove from me this curse.
Have mercy on me most high Hecate
Please take me from this place

As I stand under a troubled moon.
and fail to hear your velvet voice
the silence bears me down.
I feel your vehement neglection.
I cry silently knowing you’ll never wake.
So I face this horrid rejection.

My Mate

When will I find him?
When will love open its doors?
I dream of him
his soft lips touching my hot and flushed skin
his fingers trailing from my cheek to chin
his smile so mesmerizing like faeries in the mist
those eyes that look deep into my soul wrapping his sprit around my heart like a fist.
Yet have him, I do not
and the pain rips me to shreds.
It is so deep and consuming that air does not reach me fast enough.
I falter and struggle through this deafening desolation of my being.

How is it that we can survive not being always in each other’s arms?
I miss him so and long for his touch
the gentleness of his voice and the roughness of his lust.
I need him so much.
I need my mate.
I need to feel.
This anger and frustration I can no longer conceal.

How dare the universe and fate keep us apart?
How dare they separate his spirit from my heart!
I crave and crave and crave him so.
The tears I cry are not understood.
I feel such hatred while I scream at God for betraying what I feel inside.
I feel dead, weak and low.
It’s like I’m in a trance and just living in an ordinary flow.

I watch as others meet their mates and display such a powerful love.
They walk together always touching always kissing, never apart.
Their eyes shine with happiness and obsession for each other.
I curse at them as the comfort one another.

I can no longer take this bitter loneliness that I find is my only friend.
I need my mate, I need him here.
To wrestle me from this confusion.

“Come to me, come free me, I need you by my side.
I cannot face this world alone.
Please find me don’t leave me behind.
I’m calling for you howling in the wind.
Heart of my heart please let me in.
Please don’t forget.
Do not forsake me yet.” I cry silently in the night.

I am yours, you are forever and always mine
and until we connect our souls and mate.
We will forever drift through time
And hope to cheat fate.

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